One small positive thought in the morning can change your whole day

Friday, November 25, 2016

Dividing Lines? Doesn't have to be!

As we reflect on Thanksgiving, we can honestly say that we are so thankful for the gift of relationship. Taking care of people and relationships are among the greatest of treasures here on earth. I’m not sure if there has been a time, since the Civil War, that America has been more divided. It’s heartbreaking to see people hurting so much and displaying such anger toward each other. This is not like watching something on the news that you may or may not be able to relate to. This is in our own backyards; at our workplaces; and in our own families. It’s so easy to have political conversations with people who agree with you, but what if there are people you love that don’t agree with you? Should that change the way you feel about them? These conversations are hard and without the ability to see other people’s perspectives, it will be impossible to move forward in a positive way. This post is fairly easy to be “In the Moment” because it doesn’t matter what side of the election you are on, we are all processing how to move forward at this point. Here at In the Moment, we are divided in our beliefs, but we are united in our hearts. We have always stood on different sides of this line, but it has never been a factor in our relationship. Not even in the past couple of weeks. When the election results were in, we both knew that we had to talk about it so that we could find our common ground in order to be united in our hearts. We have honestly agreed, that we feel for each other and hope and pray that neither of us are being hurt by what’s going on in the world. We will not pretend to have all the wisdom to bring this country together once and for all, but we thought we would take a stab at sharing how we not only coexist with different political points of view, but truly believe we are stronger because of it. The following questions are designed to get a perspective from each side, not a debate on why we voted one way or another, but rather to answer questions through the lens of each side of the coin.

What is one important thing to be learned from this election?

Voted for Clinton: Our media outlets are incredibly divisive and unconcerned about truth. Many people use social media as their primary news source. I didn't realize, honestly I'd never thought of it, that my Facebook feed would look very different from someone who voted for Trump, that social media would push stories to me that would create more division. Neither liberal nor conservative media outlets are focused on absolute truth, report absolute truth, ensure that their clients are hearing/reading absolute truth; they are concerned with ratings. Outrageous, divisive stories increase ratings. We need to be more discerning with our news.

Voted for Trump: There will always be a winner and a loser. I saw so many people be equally upset when Obama won both of his terms and I am looking now, wondering if they remember what it felt like to be on the losing side of the election. I also wonder if those who are so distraught now, realize that when they were so happy that Obama won, there were people feeling just as upset as they do now with Trump. If there will always be a winner and a loser, it’s imperative that Americans learn how to do both with grace.

How is someone supposed to support a president that they don’t trust?

Voted for Clinton: I'll admit, this is hard for me. I don't support him yet. All I can say is the position of the president commands respect. As a patriot, I strongly believe this. I don't trust Donald Trump but I trust democracy, I trust "we the people".

Voted for Trump: I would have to say that propaganda is really a thing, on both sides, so just make sure that what you are reading is full truth, again, on BOTH sides. Also, it’s fair to say that
we have had former presidents who didn’t meet our moral expectations either. After that, I think it really has to be a decision to respect and support the position of President of the United States. If we are no longer debating the candidates, we did that already, then look to what this President can do that will be positive for our country.

How can Freedom of Speech be expressed without dividing the people even more?

Voted for Clinton: It is so important that we listen to hear, as opposed to listen to respond. . Go outside, go talk to your neighbor, hug your kids, and turn off the television and social media. For those whose side lost, find where you can make a real difference, get involved in positive change. For those whose side won, try to understand, people want to feel heard. As Martin Luther King, Jr said "a riot is the language of the unheard".

Voted for Trump: My best answer to this is to put everything you post or say through the filter of “what do I hope to gain from this?” If your answer is to be right, you might reconsider posting or saying it. Freedom of speech is a precious thing, but to me, the real question here is at what cost? If being right is more important than keeping relationships, then I don’t agree with that. I also believe that Freedom of Speech has to be equal on both sides. If you’re going to put your thoughts out on a public forum, then people responding to it need to have the same freedom, even if they are disagreeing with you. I will be honest and say that I have not felt like I have had the same freedoms to share my political points of view without being accused of things that are simply false about me.

What if I think that the people who voted differently than me are evil and stand for things I don’t stand for?

Voted for Clinton: I know some people who voted differently do believe in evil things; some people who voted the same as me also believe in evil things. We need to take time and recognize our friends, loved ones, other people who fight for justice, speak for those who can't speak for themselves, hurting people, wounded people, marginalized people voted differently than we did. We must be willing to listen, to find some common ground. I am committed to the #safetypin project. I am safe if you are LGBT, Muslim, Black, Hispanic, disabled, female, male, afraid, marginalized, abused or voted for the opposition! Let me know what I can do to make you feel heard and empowered.

Voted for Trump: I guess my answer to this is, it depends on how you respond. Evil is among us everywhere and we are never going to agree on everything, but the tone of this question tends to make me think of those unable to carry on relationships with people who disagreed with you.
I believe that this question might be asked from the basis of political social issues that we faced in this election. I think we should always continue to strive for social equality, regardless of what party is in office. My view on this comes from a belief system that people, fundamentally, have one of two views of America.
#1. Our founding fathers, although flawed, have passed down great values and philosophies to be carried out. That we can change as we grow in knowledge, but foundationally, we are a strong and great nation.
#2. America is an unfair place to live where being different brings about hatred. Our founding fathers were bigots and racist and foundationally we are flawed.
I happen to fall into the believe system of #1 where I believe in America. I also think the majority of Americans, on both sides, fall into believe system #1. I think that we have many opportunities to grow and change, but I believe in America to its core. It is the greatest place to live and I think that those who don’t believe in America, really should find a place to live that they like better. I don’t say that to be offensive, I really believe it. This is where riots and burning the flag becomes very offensive to people in category #1. That being said, I will reiterate that we should always continue to strive for social equality.

These questions were answered without the knowledge of the other. We hope that our views of the election, our world, and our friendship can help someone who might be feeling lost in it all.

We hope that you had a fabulous Thanksgiving and we want to encourage everyone to be mindful of loving others well!

Chrissie and Lori